1.  DRUGS.  This should go without saying, but I will say it. You must remember that while your case is pending you could be tested for drugs at any time. (Hair follicle tests can go back 3 to 6 months.)  This is especially true if you have children and custody may be an issue.

2.  LEAVE NASTY MESSAGES.  At the end of the day, even though we hope to settle peacefully, your divorce is still a lawsuit which may need to be litigated.  Voicemails, texts, and e-mails are all easy to save for use as evidence later. No matter how upset or justified you are, be very, very conscious of what you put in writing or on a recording device.  It could come back to haunt you at trial.

3. YELL OR GET ANGRY IN FRONT OF THE JUDGE, GAL OR CLERKS.  There are very few times in life when a person has more reason to be stressed out or on edge than during a divorce or custody battle.  That being said, it is important to NEVER yell, curse, or get angry in front of your children’s GAL, the judge, or other Court employees.  It is these people’s job to make judgment about you and what is best for your children in a very short period of time based on very few interactions with you.  Make certain that those interactions are positive ones so that you can be seen by the Court in the best light possible.

4. SKIP COURT.  If your attorney or the Court sends you notice of a Court date, assume you need to be there.  While there are often times when your attorney may advise you not to come to court, you should never assume that this is the case.  Bad things happen to people who miss their court dates, so be there unless you are positive you don’t need to be.

5. LIE TO YOUR LAWYER.    It is essential to quality representation that your attorney knows the truth about your case.  What you say to your attorney is confidential, and cannot be used against you.  However, if your attorney does not know what is really going on, he/she could do something to harm your case without knowing it.  For example, if you assure your attorney you have not smoked marijuana (but you have), he/she may run to court and zealously demand that the opposing party be drug tested, at which time you would also be drug tested…you get the idea.

6.  POST THINGS ON FACEBOOK.  We all love the internet, but certain things are best kept private during a divorce.  Party pictures involving alcohol (no matter how fun it was), pictures of your new main squeeze (no matter how great he/she is), and comments about your ex (no matter how annoying he/she can be) are not appropriate to post when you are involved in civil litigation.  Don’t post anything online during litigation that you would not want published on the front page of the newspaper.  (In the event you would want your ex’s numerous faults to be published on the front page of the newspaper, refrain from putting it online anyway.  (At least for now.))